.thoughts01.

i thought that i could always count on you
i thought that nothing could come between us
but i was stupid
you broke me down
i'll never be the same again.

I wonder why it always has to hurt
for every lesson that I have to learn

So thank you for showing me
that anyone cannot be trusted,

there's only hate,
there's only tears,
there's only pain,
there's only lies,
there's only pain,
there's only fears,
there is no love here..

I see right through all your selfishness
i can see through your lies

it feels just like I'm going crazy,
I'm heavily broken,
and now not even you can save me,
will someone wake me up?

i tried so hard to be the one
who i am supposed to be now
i like who I've become

leave me alone , i'm tired and sick of you
i'm tired of love, feeling so misplaced
time for you to go!
as the reasons for why i was holding on to you is gone!

right now,
I got used to living without you,
you know i love you, i really do,
but i guess i was in love with your memory,
the memories and good times we had you can have them back.

When the tables turn again,
You'll be wishing I was there for you,
I'll be the one you'll miss the most
BUT
you'll only find my ghost
as time goes by, you'll wonder why,
you're all alone

It's time to say goodbye
i just dont wanna waste another day
cause things will never be the same again
you're weighing on my shoulders
and i'm sick of feeling down
so i guess it's time for me to say goodbye

:)

nice right?
combination of mix and match from simple plan and the veronicas lyrics

psst : i'm so not emo but i find its meaningful.tralalala~will mix and match on something happy soon

pssst : i hope that i am wrong but i am falling for you..



ADIOS!!AMIGOS!!AKU BERAMBUS!!

.down down down.

so basically,
i've been totally sick for the past five days
finally get my ass off of my bed
and went to see the doctor yesterday
NO injection, NO long life's theories
but the doctor pranked me on swine flu
i though doctor is supposedly to calm you down and not making you more nervous?

anyway,
woke up with superb down mood
i dont know why
maybe as what yen said
i'm already used of going out everyday
that i for sure, wont get used of staying home doing absolutely nothing
since i feels dizzy and sleepy after i eat the medicine

true, totally agree with her
two more weeks before uni reopens
just fingers crossed that i will recover soon and utilize the rest of my holidays with excitements.hahaha!

anyway,
just being a typical susan
i've planned well how to utilize my first week of first semester with excitement
tralalalala~

so lets just fingers crossed and pray superb hard that i will be fine soon
sick of being sick!

TEEHEE!



ADIOS!!AMIGOS!!AKU BERAMBUS!!

.happy 21st birthday, XL.

this post specially dedicated to my beloved XL
no no no,her name not XL
but tan pei lin!
lol
XL is just a nickname i used to call her cause she keeps teasing around and calling me fatty
somehow,i kinda get used of that nickname and respond to her everytime she called "fatty"
-_-" superb sweat right?

so 18.06.1988
is when pei lin was first step into this world
*my god.sounded so formal*
and 15 years later, i am thankful that i got to know her from tuition
and since then, we got clicked very fast and bond with our own little group

so today is the day
pei lin's 21st birthday!
special post specially dedicated to you!
shocker right?hahahah
me too!i dont know why but i have sudden urge to blog..dang!

time seriously pass freaking fast
7 years of friendship
thanks for being there for me!
fetching me around without complaining,
and i do still remember you wasted your whole night fetching and waiting me for click five's concert.
appreciates that! *wink*
i know you love me.wakakaka!
nenebubu!


she is also a person who have the special power
to make a person totally happy and LOL
with her laughter...


..everything seems okay!hahaha

this girl here.can be consider as my partner in crime too!
we acted totally retarded and lunatic!

way back then..
*i looked superb fugly*


and now..
my little pei lin aka XL has changed to a pretty and more lady

told you she loves me.thats why she superb excited that she get the chance to snap picture with me. wakakak.tralalala~

a proper picture of me and her

apart from that, she loves to ruin my SS moment
maybe she just being jealous of my beauty?NO?YES?hehe

so,in return!
i cant stand it anymore and i try to ruin her own SS moment


truly appreciates our friendship :)

after knowing that swine flu has been spreading rapidly
pei lin has canceled her origin plan to go to hong kong
so, she have her own birthday party at her house!

*taken in her house. i know this picture is without her but somehow,i like this picture coz i look nice and thin.NYIEK NYIEK*

*long live MGSians*
LOL

once again,

HAPPY 21ST BIRTHDAY
PEI LIN AKA XL!!
XOXO

I used to think that I was strong
Until the day it all went wrong
I think I need a miracle to make it through

ADIOS!!AMIGOS!!AKU BERAMBUS!!

.that's retarded.

what an illusion,
i need to be free of this confusion,
dont give me a guilt trip,
because I'm so OVER it.

so basically,
i am sick when i am blogging this
flu but ABSOLUTELY NOT SWINE FLU
though i am afraid i have!

few weeks ago,
while organizing my picture files,
i saw some retarded pictures of me and some of my friends
during our pre-prom night!
MAB phase one!

and i remembered promising my friends that i will post it
hahaha
sorry ya.took it kinda long time to actually post it
anyway, i am just plain lazy and busy to actually finish editting the pictures
so, i took almost a month to actually edit it.haha

so here it goes!
anyway,sorry ya the superb low quality picture
somehow,everything turns out blur!

the cast:

king fong the kalimantan boy *inside joke*
as the mr pervert

jason cheah aka khairul *inside joke*
as the prince

jye ming aka jakarta myanmar *inside joke*
as the lesbian princess!

with special guest appearance:

ME~ as the innocent princess! LMAO

Once a upon a time..bla bla bla!
cut the crap.straight to the point!

as the innocent princess happily walk around the bilik seminar while singing her favourite song..all of sudden!
ARGH!!

king fong D pervert : MUAHAHAHA. i am evil! and i love innocent princess!
you looks delicious... -_-"
susan D princess : oopsy! i know i am pretty but its not my fault tho..
urgh.help!!somebody!

then.jason D prince heard the princess screaming for help
and here he comes..to rescue the princess!

jason D prince : what is wrong with you huh? you think i dont know who you are. disguising yourself with the stupid silly mask. you are my evil bro, king fong!
king fong D pervert : eh!?! i paid a lot for that mask..but fails!sigh
talk less!come and fight with me!

unfortunately, jason D prince is too weak and got beaten by his evil brother. and R.I.P la prince! sobs sobs!


the princess helplessly watch the prince got defeated
and continues scream for help!


then..all of sudden
a lesbo princess from lesbo country comes for the rescue!
JYE MING D HERO!

king fong D pervert : what the heck? you are just a girl..and you wanna fight with me? HELL NO! i dont fight with girls..especially a girl who is wearing sari!
jye ming D hero : what do u mean by that huh? i'm not just an ordinary girl okay?bring it on,brother!!
susan D princess : ..... headache?

jye ming D hero : have some of my famous chun li kick!!
king fong D pervert : *blocked* nenebubu! you aint gonna kick me!

*sorry for the error.its a superb low budget movie* -_-"

jye ming D hero : how about this?? WACHAAA!
king fong D pervert : DOOMMM!


and finally, jye ming D hero defeated the pervert!
say HOORAY!

jye ming D hero : if you smellllll,what the jye ming is cookin'

*jye ming looks like the statue of liberty in here*

and..finally
as how all the fairytale stories ended up with
THEY FALL IN LOVE AND LIVED HAPPILY EVER AFTER!!
yada yada yada


lame right?i know..
and nobody get hurts while shooting this retarded drama.
*or even the snail*
thank you!
wakakaka!
finally, i am cracked and gone cuckoo!
and dont mind the lameness.i'm too tired to really think how it goes.haha

anyway,am off to bed soon
tired day

-just watched blood : the last vampire! not that nice..-

stripped and polished,
i am new,
i am fresh,
i am feeling ambitious!

i shall end with a picture of the SS trio!
ah head, ah neck and ah tail!
love you guys!
xoxo


ADIOS!!AMIGOS!!AKU BERAMBUS!!

.yet, another beautiful day.

the whispers turn to shouting,
the shouting turns to tears.

i know i have make some chaos regarding to my latest post
thanks everyone for your concern
superb touched :)
no worries.i am okay, as usual!

thanks for your sms-es, IMs, calls
i know i have frightens a lot of my friends
but this is something that you guys dont know
and err.now you know?LOL
no worries, i will try my best to cope with it
i am tough right?
wakakka..

psst : its funny how some of my friends show concern to me. they dont really dare to ask me what happened but still, they wanna know. the way they asked is superb cute. trying not to makes me sad ..but you know what? you guys just makes me smile..! :)

thanks ya!
hugs and kisses!
xoxo

i'm trying my best to wake up,
i'm waking up,
a twist in my story,
its time i open up.

-find me in twitter-
finally get a twitter account after much persuasion from friends :)

anyway,am having so much fun today
today is all about excitement!
thanks you guys!
xoxo

-" drag me to hell" is not scary but superb disgusting-


ADIOS!!AMIGOS!!AKU BERAMBUS!!

.i'm dead and gone.

DONT BOTHER TO READ THIS!!

as what you can see, i've change a little bit of the layout of my blog.
i dont know why,but have the sudden urge to do so
honestly, i have tonnes of stuff to be blog about yesterday.
its been a while since i cried.
and too many stuff is bugging me at the same time.
but now, i'm feeling slightly better *thanks bren* winks!

all i can say is..
everything is totally fucked up now.
i'm confused.
feeling useless
and sorry for everything i have done
trying to minimize but actually maximizing the troubles

it still hurts..
i cried and feeling heartbroken everytime i think about it..
somehow,people who you think you can trust isnt that reliable..
especially people who have been there since you were born.. looking out for you, watching you grow up
i must admit,
i grew up with a broken family
a family full of dramas and problems.
at times,i feel its like a tvb hong kong dramas
full of lies, betrayal and other stuff
as individual, they love and care me
as a family, i dont see the meaning of family anymore
i cant differentiate who is right and who is wrong anymore
it freaks me out everytime
i love them but i just couldnt take it any longer
as what someone said, for what i have become is because of them

looking at what have happened since i was young
i have learned to hide all my emotions towards people i care
and i dare not confront to anyone as i am afraid of being hurt
i dare not to tell the truth as i am afraid of getting heart ache
and what did i get for hiding all my emotions?
yet,another heartbroken!

somehow, i noticed the changes inside of me
starting from this year
but for better or for worse?
honestly,i dont know!
i dont really know who am i anymore
at times,i miss the old me
but i love the new me as well
but am i crossing the line with the new me?...maybe,perhaps!




ADIOS!!AMIGOS!!AKU BERAMBUS!!

..

" I'M SUPER HYPER RIGHT NOW
I DONT KNOW WHY
BUT CONFUSED AT THE SAME TIME
FEEL LIKE TELLING EVERYTHING OUT
BUT MY MIND IS SUPERB TIRED AND BLANK
MUAHAHA "

just ignore me,can?
i'm just being silly at this moment and at this time
when i should get some sleep after all this excitement
but i just cant!
grrr..

anyway, MOS all the way
dont really like Sanctuary
why?
simple!
No dance floor.NO fun!
weeee

and just realised i can drink quite a lot.didnt know that
since all i do is just dance whenever i go to club
not a big fans of alcohol.
but today would be the exception.LOL

*will be updating soon as susan is seriously back to business*
i know i know!
i've said that for so many times.pfft
but this is for real as i need to start being serious and lead an healthy life

been sick for the past few days
with breathing difficulty and heart pain
sigh. most probably because i've been sleeping late.sigh.


psst : my passion towards dance and music is getting stronger as day passes by.
its already been part of my life!haha


ignore the retarded face of mine as well as wan yean
LOL.i was just showing off my smooth and silky hair.LOL
once in a blue moon tau ?
that i have a nice hair day.grr!

shall i curl or shall i just cut it short?

ADIOS!!AMIGOS!!AKU BERAMBUS!!

*oik mangkuk kenneth.you can start comment now.GO ON!LOL*